Andrea is now the main caregiver from Benefits of Home and mom is always happy to see her.
This is not really the kind of post I like to write but it’s a reality. The shallow protection of denial has ran its course again. Either I had the flu over the weekend or my entire body and being finally shouted – Stop everything!. I gave up and couldn’t help myself. On Monday morning I resurfaced feeling drained of everything I had attempted for months and realized that “Giving it my all” is still not nearly enough – or maybe even wrong. Empty and weak I began the fight with those hungry enemies of my strength and spirit – resentment, blame, judgement. I know “Pointing a finger” does not accomplish and always leads to regret. Insidious toxins that want to take power seize my grounding.
Time to pull myself up for yet another fresh start. What next? Where is this going? What am I not seeing? Waiting for answers, waiting for help. Thankfully I don’t feel alone and abandoned and can usually stay in touch with the Bigger Picture.
I Get By With a Little Help from My Friends
The Flip Side
Mom is waiting with excitement for Jeff to arrive in the “Limo” to escort her home.
Tuesday afternoon and things are lining up better. Now the big deal around the Villas is that the flu has gone wild and many of the residents are catching it. Andrea strongly suggested mom eat dinner in her room and stay out of the dining room. I’m really trying to leave for home in a few days and if mom gets sick that plan will hit a wall and I cant imagine her being able to handle it. She won’t get it! She had her final check-up at the doctor yesterday afternoon and is clear of all infection. Perhaps the antibiotic she is still taking will help keep the flu from finding her. I feel so good about her overall presence and health since she stopped taking her pain medications and cut her blood pressure medication to an even lower dosage. Now the aching legs and difficulty walking are the remaining challenge. The memory issues are constantly lurking in the background. That’s the scariest thing of all.